| Date_time |
Name |
comments |
|
5/12/2006 11:44:39 PM |
John |
Post her on Jokes, funny things you've heard or seen. |
|
7/18/2008 9:56:56 AM |
|
A married man was having an affair with his secretary. One day, their passions overcame them and they took off for her house, where they made passionate love all afternoon. Exhausted from the wild sex, they fell asleep, awakening around 8.00 p.m. As the man threw on his clothes, he told the woman to take his shoes outside and rub them through the grass and dirt. Mystified, she nonetheless complied.
He slipped into his shoes and drove home.
Where have you been!" demanded his wife when he entered the house.
"Darling, I can't lie to you. I've been having an affair with my secretary, and we've been having sex all afternoon. I fell asleep and didn't wake up until 8.00 p.m."
The wife glanced down at his shoes and said, "You lying bastard!
You've been playing golf!!" |
|
7/18/2008 10:04:09 AM |
|
An Englishman, an Irishman, a Scotsman, an Aussie, an Abo, a Yank, an African, an elephant, a refrigerator, two blondes, a homosexual, three social workers, a Jew, a crocodile and a kiwi all walked into a bar.
The bartender turned around and said, "Is this some kind of a joke?" |
|
7/22/2008 6:11:35 AM |
|
Amy, a city girl, marries a farmer. One morning, before he goes out to the fields, the farmer says to her, "The artificial insemination man is coming to impregnate one of our cows today. I drove a big nail into the two-by-four over the cow's stall. You show him where it is." The farmer leaves, and a while later, the artificial insemination man arrives. Amy takes him down the rows of cows until she sees the nail. She says, "This is the one, right here." The man says, "How do you know?" Amy says, "By the nail over its stall." The man says, "What's the nail for?" Amy says, "I guess it's to hang your pants on." |
|
7/29/2008 9:29:21 PM |
bubba |
Three engineers and three accountants are traveling by train to a conference. At the station, the three accountants each buy a ticket and watch as the three engineers only buy one ticket.
"How are three people going to travel on only one ticket?" asks an accountant.
"Watch and you'll see," answered an engineer.
They all board the train. The accountants take their respective seats but all three engineers cram into a rest room and close the door behind them.
Shortly after the train has departed, the conductor comes around collecting tickets. He knocks on the restroom door and says, "Tickets, please!" The door opens just a crack and a single arm emerges with a ticket in hand. The conductor takes it and moves on.
The accountants see this and agree it is a clever idea. So after the conference, the accountants decide to copy the engineers on the return trip and save some money.
When they get to the station, they buy one ticket for the return trip. To their astonishment, the engineers don't buy a ticket at all.
"How are you going to travel without a ticket?" says one perplexed accountant.
"Watch and you'll see," answered an engineer.
When they board the train all three accountants cram into a restroom and the three engineers cram into another one nearby. The train departs.
Shortly afterward, one of the engineers leaves his restroom and walks over to the restroom where the accountants are hiding. He knocks on the door and says, "Tickets, please!" |
|
7/29/2008 9:32:38 PM |
bubba |
A man was riding his Harley along a California beach when suddenly the sky parted above his head and, in a booming voice, the Lord said,
'Because you have tried to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish.'
The biker pulled over and said, 'Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride over anytime I want.' The Lord said, 'Your request is materialistic. Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking; the supports reaching the bottom of the Pacific and the concrete and steel it would take! It will nearly exhaust several natural resources. I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of something that could possibly help mankind.'
The biker thought about it for a long time. Finally, he said, 'Lord, I wish that I and all men could understand women; I want to know how she feels inside, what she's thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she cries, what she means when she says nothings wrong, and how I can make a woman truly happy.'
The Lord replied, 'You want two lanes or four on that bridge?' |
Refresh page for updating
|
Comedy
